A Greater Love

Love. It seems to make the world go round. We look for it in all the wrong places until we find it in the right one. In God. “His faithful love endures forever” (Psalm 136). Then we find Him and we sometimes still keep looking in all the wrong places. Relationships. People. Money. Things. Sometimes love in these things is good, even great…. but the love that is most fulfilling? Well, that’s found in Him.

A while ago I wrote a post called The Inconvenient Truth. It was kind of a sad post. I was at a place in my walk with God where I was questioning whether or not He loved me and whether or not I actually mattered to him.  That was, what?…. August. Yes. August, I was at home. My prayer at the end was David’s prayer… “Lord, let morning bring word of your unfailing love.”

Do you grasp that people are incapable of loving perfectly and as profoundly as God? Imagine your greatest love relationship, be it with a spouse, a parent, a best friend, a brother or sister. God’s is greater than that.

I didn’t grasp that for the longest time… until one day this fall God spoke a truth in a very intimate way to a very specific hole that I think a lot of people can have in their hearts.

This past Fall I was getting to a place of just pure exhaustion from unanswered prayers, spreading myself too thin, taking too much on myself with different activities I was involved in, feeling tired of praying over and over again, but knowing God was growing me into a more fervent prayer. We were at a retreat in the fall and the topic was EXHAUSTION. While the pastor, Rob Gerber, was speaking I began to thinking about all the things that had been exhausting me.
One of them was marriage; not as though I, a more than content single servant of Christ, was really  in a place to be exhausted by thoughts of it… but there was one truth that God really wanted to reveal to me. I began to remember thinking about who in their right minds would ever actually sign up to spend a lifetime with another person. By this time I’d already concluded that marriage is in fact a good thing and a glorifying thing for two people who wanted to spur one another on in following God. Then in my heart, I switched the perspective to me which really hit the sore spot it was supposed to…

“God, who would ever want to marry me? Me, with all of my hurts, with all of my sin, with all of my trials? Who would ever want to promise themselves to a life with me?”

Then in my moment of sadness and vulnerability, God revealed in my heart a true wounding, but what was even greater was what came next:

I do.” God said. “I do, Teresa. I want to spend your whole life with you, I want to spend all of eternity with you. That is why I sent my Son, that is why I died on the cross, so I could be with you forever.”

My response in my heart was “Really God? You want to spend the rest of eternity with little ol’ me?”.

I just wept!

God’s love for me changed so much. For the months and years before that I had wondered and wondered: God do you love me? How much do you love me? I know you do, but I just don’t know what that means. Let morning bring word of your unfailing love. This was my prayer for months and months. I just kept praying and waiting. My perspective on who God is completely changed as He spoke truth to a very specific hole in my heart that I think a lot of people can come across in their life. I was grateful to God for that truth. It’s so undeniably awesome that I never go back to that place and wonder who would ever love me because the creator of the universe loves me, takes notice of me, speaks to my heart sweet words of love.

Do you know God loves you? (Psalm 139, 1 John 4:7-16)

Do you know a true, deep, sincere, unconditional love for God?  (Psalm 63)

Seek it. 

What does a bridegroom say to his beloved? “I do.” So does God.

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